Crunchy Bytes

An elderly parishioner has stunned Spanish cultural officials with an alarming and unauthorised attempt to restore a prized Jesus Christ fresco.

The woman, in her 80s, was reportedly upset at the way the fresco had deteriorated and took it on herself to “restore” the image.

BBC Europe correspondent Christian Fraser says the delicate brush strokes of Elias Garcia Martinez have been buried under a haphazard splattering of paint.

The once-dignified portrait now resembles a crayon sketch of a very hairy monkey in an ill-fitting tunic, he says.

Oh sweet jeebus.

This reminds me of the time my wife’s mother decided to “fix” my wife’s sculpture project the night before the assignment was due. My mother-in-law has no training whatsoever in art.  The results, as you can imagine, were disastrous and ended with my wife tearfully trying to repair the damage in time.  Few times have I been as tempted to murder someone in cold blood as then.